Kong me

King Kong, the remake. It’s okay, but only just. If ever a movie called for better editing this is it. I’ve got nothing against three hour movies; I actually prefer longer movies to tell the truth. The thing is, this movie is an action/adventure movie masquerading as a cheesy noir throwback, disguised as a heady mind bender along the lines of Heart of Darkness, but it just doesn’t do any of these very well. I wish the director had taken out all the expensive, predictable, conventional CG ape-on-dinosaur action sequences and spent more time developing the characters so that the viewer could be more invested in them. That way those longing looks between the chicky (and that’s all she is to us as the director portrays her) and the ape wouldn’t come off so very awkward and I wouldn’t be tittering under my breath at the admittedly juvenile joke that just occurred to me.

I also wish the director had been a little more subtle and smart about developing the potentially very interesting themes raised in the film. Instead, he uses the oh-so-corny monolog chock full of literary references and sage sociological commentary uttered by lightweights who have no business speaking like a bad fortune cookie. They’re so over the top, though, that you aren’t quite sure if the director/writer is merely trying to copy the feel of a classic noir film or if he’s inviting us to laugh at this ham fisted parody of that old-timey style. I settled for the intermediary position and uttered an uneasy chuckle at the closing line of the movie: “Oh, no, it wasn't the airplanes; it was beauty killed the beast.”