No way! Michelob?!

Look, I feel compelled to state my credentials because I am about to say a few things that will rankle the hides of fine beer connoisseur the world over. I really, really love good beer and, on occasion, awful beer. But I can tell the difference. I think I've been blessed with a fairly discerning nose and palette. When I was an undergraduate I had several bookshelves lines with empty beer bottles within which were placed rolled-up slips of paper displaying my review for that particular bottle. The majority of the positive reviews went the Boston Brewery's Samuel Adams beers and the occasional Sierra Nevada (Cascade hops being the notable overlap between Sam Adams and Sierra Nevada; no more distinctive flavor has ever been brewed in my opinion), local apple cider, and of course the venerable Samuel Smith beers (please, will someone buy me a pint of Sam Smith's Oatmeal Stout?!)

OK, the first thing I have to say is that Michelob (yes, that Michelob) has made a fine beer in Michelob Celebrate, which they sell in 24 oz. Christmas gift boxes. It claims to be a "superior lager brewed with real vanilla beans and aged on bourbon barrel oak." Here's what it delivers: an indifferent mouthfeel, a mediocre amber, and a blast of semi-sweet vanilla with a beautifully counterbalanced sophistication of aged oak. That, together with a pleasantly spicy alcohol (10%) and a pleasantly un-Michelob-like bitterness, makes for an extremely enjoyable beer. Note that I said "beer" as opposed to the barley wine offered by the likes of Samuel Adams Triple Bock. While Michelob's Celebrate appears to be marketted in such a way as to compete with the likes of the Triple Bock "barley wine", it is merely a lager, albeit a a very good lager. Despite what I've said about its apperance and mouthfeel, it has a complex flavor with strong notes of vanilla and oak (oh, what a heavenly combination!) while sill retaining enough bitterness and dryness to refrain from criticisms of selling out to the mas market for which Michelob has a dubious destinction. All in all, kudos for a very enjoyabble concoction.

OK, having staked my beer connoisseur reputation on Michelob Celebreate being a rather nifty beer, I will further imperil my reputation by making this second observation: you too can "create" a fine beer with a similar flavor profile by a few tricks that are apt to fool even the expert. Take yourself a decent amber ale (i.e. Flying Dog Amber Lager), add to it about 3/4 ounce fine bourbon whisky (i.e. Maker's Mark), and then a half teaspoon or so of vanilla extract (imitation "vanillin" will do just fine). Pour all these into a snifter and you will be amazed at the remarks: "cask conditioned," "hand crafted," "old-world...." If only there were a way for the maker to forget that he "concocted" this fine beer, he would then be able to enjoy it the more therefore. But that's okay because beer was made to be shared with friends. Make your friends a vanilla-oak beer cocktail and they shall enjoy it in your stead and you shall shed a connoisseur's prideful tear with the satisfied empathy due the gracious host.